The begining

I was raised in a large family 2 older and 2 younger, frankly I NEVER Doubted my parents love for me, I reamember very little about my child hood other that that one fact My Parents loved me.We had a aunt who lived next door to us and she was married to this guy who liked little girls, the first time he touched me I was six I have tried for so long in my life to forget about him but their are time's where a smell or a sound will bring him back for me.
I was six and he said that he could hurt me or my sister so I let him hurt me, he kept hurting me till I was 9. By the age of 9 I was able to go knumb, I could see what was going on around me but feel nothing, I once watched him as he hurt me up against a wall, he had me stand on a chair so he could reach me ( i was small amd he was a lot taller than me )
and I watched .when he was done he gave me the same line he alway's did, That I was chosen because I was a good girl and so sweet.I finally got him to stop by making friends with the local pimp's I told them he was hurting me( after I thew my self down the stairs so I could have bruises) they beat the hell out of him and told him to leave me alone.. He did (by this time my sister was entering her teens and could take care of herr self) she was always older than me but I always belived I had to take care of her, I knew somthing was wrong with her before my parents did, I knew it always.by the of 11 i was a cronic Runnaway I had been to 3 private shools, ( 2 catholic and 1 baptist) i was thown out of all of them . I was hanging out in pool halls and club's smoking pot a scewing any guy who wanted me. I evan slept with my sister boy friend he was 21. he wanted me to go with him to california.(I was'nt even 12 yet) at 12 the state got tired of my bull shit and was going to put me away, befor they did I me my Saving grace. He made want to be better
I did'nt under stand it and it even scared me (alot) I started going to school , I started staying home waiting for him to come over to see me after he got off of work, he was 4 years older than me and and a whole other world he was a world in witch I felt clean and loved and wanted. He was someone who wanted me, he belived i could do well in this world. when iI was 12 just 2 weeks after meeting him he told my mother he was going to marry me, she laughed at him. well the state did send me away i was sent to a youth center and yes I did run away from there ( I took the whole Dam floor with me 20 girls total). The state finnaly gave up when my mother told them what a good influence my Hun was on me how he had me going to school and staying home at night ( They no longer needed to nail my windows shut- I still got out) and I was behaving .
I was placed on probation and sent home (to behave).At this time I was breaking tie's with my pimp buddie's and my Drug buddie's ( I could sell coke to pepsie) and they was not pleased with me, twice they tried to rape me and twice i fought back, when I finnaly set one on fire they got the message to leave me alone.
At this time my sister had a new boy friend who like to beat her, he even tried to rape me. I fixed his ass good I gave him a dirty batch of coke that put in the hospital for 3 weeks when he got out I put a knife to his neck and woke him , I explaned how things where going to be from then on, ( he neverr hit my sister again.)